Is there ANYTHING that bacon cannot do?

You can boil it, fry it, wrap it around stuff and bake it...  I mean...  I guess the only thing bacon can't do is be kosher.  I used to think that you couldn't burn through steel with it, but then...



Who's with me?  We go to the Olive Garden, knock 'em over for some bread sticks and Eye-talian fancy bacon, and go on an arch-villain crime spree?!